September 2010
79 posts
I get Susan Sarandon and Sigourney Weaver mixed up…anybody else have that problem?
Very happy that @switzr1 is picking up my movies at Best Buy so I can lay in bed and do nothing today.
“Cooties aren’t real, bitch.” - @switzr1
Laying in bed, watching Ghostbusters, drinking Xyience, everyone can eat shit!
Still finding hair on me from that fucking dog.
We definitely got pics doing the wrestler fist pose….and ones with us all standing on rocks doing the Randy Orton “release the doves” pose
I just read that Ian Rotten got kicked out of JC Bailey’s funeral…and asked the parents for gas money…wow.
So much fun at this reception. Lots of shitty dancing and pictures. Tremendous.
Made it to Bloomington. #fuckthisdrive
NEWSFLASH: Girl in the green dress, you are NOT pulling that off…at all.
Still driving. #stoppedtohavesex #sotired #caseytweeted@me #cagedoesntanswerhisphone #longweekend #holydemonarmydvdtomorrow #hott #TEXTIT!
Leaving now….@christianxrose is trying to nail drunk bitches…I’m a helluva wingman. Peace out.
What’s that? Oh I’m just sittin here lookin like a boss! http://plixi.com/p/43500372
So…we were late and half the people already seated themselves.
Speaking now. Yeah, I said it. #fuckthis
The bride is being escorted to the alter by the old man from Up! http://plixi.com/p/43497731
Snickerdoodle
Tweeting while taking a piss, in the woods, during the prayer, at the wedding. Legit. I keep it classy.
SNICKERDOODLE! SNICKERDOODLE! GODDAMMIT PEOPLE, SNICKERDODDLE!!!
Eating Busy Corner again with @AlexCastlefan @proudcaucasian @dannycannon&anniecannon Christian Rose’s fat ass is still asleep on the couch
Joe Grizzly MUTHAFUCKA!!!
Btw, I’m carrying around a cigar in a little glass tube from last night. Just pointing it at people and saying “Let me tell you somethin.”
They won’t give me a smaller tux…shit makes me look all puffy. You think I’ve been losing weight for 2 months for nothin, bitch? #surly
My mood for the day: surly
Being driven around in a nice vehicle always makes me feel like a celebrity. Also that mall we just left is prime zombie territory.
Packed house again tonight, welcome to the suck. #hott #TEXTIT! #fuck
This tweet is the most involvement that I will have with this godforsaken event. Legit. http://plixi.com/p/43300789
At the wedding site. Seems appropriate. http://plixi.com/p/43297722
Let’s see how this veal parmesan is….never had veal. #freemeal
Just wrote the word poop on the table…it’s a fancy restaurant.
Just tried creme brulee…meh….I didn’t care for it.
Middle of nowhere. #enchantedforest #deadflowers #oneleg #slutlife #wishIwasdead #worstplaceimaginable #smellslikestrippers #bigfuckoffbird
Oh.My.Fucking.God. This veal parmesan….hott! TEXTIT!
I’m gonna kill something. #fuckthis #hateweddings #upyourass #naturesucks #sotired #hott #TEXTIT! #noroad #livinghell #eatshit #nohope #die
Never seen this before in my life. Shocked. http://plixi.com/p/43257178
BULL SHIT! RT @christianxrose I am a goddamn role model.
Somebody gonna tweet results from #PWG #BOLA ?
That fried chicken was outstanding. Good pie as well. Overall not a bad day so far. #stillsurly
Chipotle round 2 complete. Had chicken/pork/steak tacos. So hott! TEXT IT!
May need Chipotle-way. In pain. Not hott. TEXT IT! #myasshole #hurts
I wasn’t tired until we got to Steak n’ Shake. Somehow moving into an area with lights made me want to go to sleep. #hott #TEXTIT! #fuck
Nott hott. TEXT IT! http://plixi.com/p/43059224
Now eating Dairy Queen #fatday #hott #TEXTIT!
Hott sauce. TEXT IT! http://plixi.com/p/43044040
This wedding is outside…I’m de-sleeving my tux if I get hott. TEXT IT!
Got 9 Blu-rays and 3 cd’s at Best Buy for $157. Hott deal. TEXT IT!
Wearing a black shirt in the sun. So hott. TEXT IT!
Eating Chipotle, @proudcaucasian will be hott about this. TEXT IT!
“I was lookin at suicide.” - Dude on the radio. He made it sound like he was shopping for it. Maybe run downtown and pick up some suicide.
He continued to say “I’ve had bigfoot encounters. I’ve been abducted a number of times.” Where do these people come from?